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Thread: Jokes.




  1. #1491

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    The Dress Of Love


    An old woman went to visit her daughter and she found her naked, waiting
    for her husband. The mother asks the daughter: "What are you doing
    naked?"

    The daughter responds: "This is the dress of love."

    When the mother returns home, she strips naked and waits for her husband.

    When her husband arrives, he asks her: "What are you doing naked, woman?"

    She responds: "This is the dress of love."

    And he says to her: "Well, go iron it first."
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  2. #1492
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Christmas is cancelled!

    T`was the night before Christmas-old Santa was pissed
    He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
    Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
    I have a good mind to scrap the whole works.
    I`ve busted my ass for damn near a year
    Instead of "thanks Santa"-what do I hear?
    The old lady *****es cause I work late at night..
    The elves want more money-The reindeer all fight.
    Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
    Donner is pregnant and vixen has AIDS.
    And just when I thought things would get better,
    Those *******s from IRS sent me a letter.
    They say I owe taxes- if that aint funny
    Who ever sent Santa Claus any money?
    And the kids these days- they all are the pits
    They want the impossible...Those mean little sh*ts
    I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
    Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
    I made a ton of yoyo`s - No request for them...
    They want computers and robots...they think I`m IBM
    Flying through the air...dodging the trees,
    Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
    I`m quitting this job...there`s just no enjoyment
    I`ll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.
    There`s no christmas this year...now you know the
    reason...
    I found me a blonde. I`m going SOUTH for the season.



    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl::rofl:

  3. #1493
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
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    3,129

    Default

    Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
    Sam : "It's a family tradition".
    Teacher : "What do you mean?"
    Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
    Teacher : "What about your mother?"
    Sam : "She's a woman".


    Teacher : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
    One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."
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  4. #1494
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    Default

    And here I thought his Grandad was TT BG Mod. :eek:
    Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you recall.

  5. #1495
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Posts
    4,246

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by dryadsoul
    And here I thought his Grandad was TT BG Mod. :eek:
    nah, it's just what he will grow up to be :rofl:
    I've gone too far and need to move on!

  6. #1496
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
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    Quote Originally Posted by minibubba
    nah, it's just what he will grow up to be :rofl:
    does that mean Olie = George Washington's grand dad? :rofl:
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    Last Updated:
    10th MARCH


    If you are a security freak: Use Microsoft Baseline Security Analyzer (NT/2000/XP/2003)
    ======================
    icq : 203189004
    jabber : asklepios20@jabber.org
    =======================
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    yabaa dabaa doo...
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  7. #1497
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    Default

    this is an excerpt from a real IRC room
    -----------------------------
    t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
    BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us when i say...
    BlackAdder> WRONG BTICH
    BlackAdder> IM SICK OF YOU
    BlackAdder> AND YOUR LAME STORIES
    BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE THINKS YOURE FUNNY
    BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR STORIES
    BlackAdder> IN FACT
    BlackAdder> IF YOU DIED RIGHT NOW
    BlackAdder> I DON"T THINK NOBODY WOULD CARE
    BlackAdder> SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT FAG
    *** t0rbad sets mode: +b BlackAdder*!*@*.*
    *** BlackAdder has been kicked by t0rbad ( )
    t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
    CRCError> right
    heartless> Right.
    r3v> right
    ----------------------------
    Latest Microsoft Security Updates.
    Last Updated:
    10th MARCH


    If you are a security freak: Use Microsoft Baseline Security Analyzer (NT/2000/XP/2003)
    ======================
    icq : 203189004
    jabber : asklepios20@jabber.org
    =======================
    Linux user since: April 24, 2003 312478
    yabaa dabaa doo...
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  8. #1498
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    Quote Originally Posted by asklepios
    this is an excerpt from a real IRC room
    -----------------------------
    :rofl: god that's good...

    i was talking about the sam/teacher joke before, you've got to do a lot of talking to be a TT mod in the BG ...or at least it seems that way ;) :laugh:
    I've gone too far and need to move on!

  9. #1499
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by minibubba
    i was talking about the sam/teacher joke before, you've got to do a lot of talking to be a TT mod in the BG ...or at least it seems that way ;) :laugh:
    oh and i thought you ppl were talking abt TT BG Mod being more dangerous than a guy with an axe in hand :rofl:
    Latest Microsoft Security Updates.
    Last Updated:
    10th MARCH


    If you are a security freak: Use Microsoft Baseline Security Analyzer (NT/2000/XP/2003)
    ======================
    icq : 203189004
    jabber : asklepios20@jabber.org
    =======================
    Linux user since: April 24, 2003 312478
    yabaa dabaa doo...
    Customized for 1024x768

  10. #1500
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    4,246

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by asklepios
    oh and i thought you ppl were talking abt TT BG Mod being more dangerous than a guy with an axe in hand :rofl:
    that's true too! :devil:
    I've gone too far and need to move on!

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