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Thread: can reindeers fly ??




  1. #1
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    • Q: What is the difference between erotic sex and kinky sex?
    A: During erotic sex you use a feather, during kinky sex you use the whole chicken.

  2. #2
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    Dude you one tweaked unit !!!
    Vulcan chicks are hot .......... Cezch chicks are hot ............ my left palm is not

  3. #3

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    Heh, nice article.

    Of course, the calculations have not included the not inconsiderable weight of the sleigh, presents, and portly old man himself, but Viscardi says thatís not a problem. ďMost birds, especially the eagles that Iíve based these calculations on, can lift a fair bit more than their own weight.
    Are we sure about that? Santa's a pretty heavy guy, and then there's all those tonnes of presents...
    This is where my signature would go had my host not been such a Bandwidth Nazi.

  4. #4
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    <CENTER>The Physics of Santa and His Reindeer</CENTER>
    <BR>
    No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.
    <BR><BR>
    There are two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't appear to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total — <NOBR>378 million</NOBR> according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of

    <IMG SRC="http://www.snopes.com/holidays/christmas/graphics/rudolph1.gif" HSPACE=16 VSPACE=16 ALT="Rudolph" ALIGN=LEFT BORDER=0>

    <NOBR>3.5 children</NOBR> per household, that's <NOBR>91.8 million</NOBR> homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.
    <BR><BR>
    Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to <NOBR>822.6 visits</NOBR> per second.
    <BR><BR>
    This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each of these <NOBR>91.8 million</NOBR> stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about <NOBR>.78 miles</NOBR> per household, a total trip of 75½ million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every <NOBR>31 hours,</NOBR> plus feeding and etc.
    <BR><BR>
    This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky <NOBR>27.4 miles</NOBR> per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, <NOBR>15 miles</NOBR> per hour.
    <BR><BR>
    If every one of the 91.8 million homes with good children were to put
    out a single chocolate chip cookie and an 8 ounce glass of 2% milk, the
    total calories (needless to say other vitamins and minerals) would be
    approximately 225 calories (100 for the cookie, give or take, and 125 for
    the milk, give or take). Multiplying the number of calories per house by
    the number of homes (225 x 91.8 x 1000000), we get the total number of
    calories Santa consumes that night, which is 20,655,000,000 calories. To
    break it down further, 1 pound is equal to 3500 calories. Dividing our
    total number of calories by the number of calories in a pound (20655000000/3500) and we get the number of pounds Santa gains, 5901428.6, which is 2950.7 tons.
    <BR><BR>
    The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than <NOBR>300
    pounds.</NOBR> Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see above) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload (not even counting the weight of the sleigh) - to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison - this is four
    times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth. 353,000 tons traveling at <NOBR>650 miles</NOBR> per second creates enormous air resistance - this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecraft
    <NOBR>re-entering</NOBR> the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb <NOBR>14.3 QUINTILLION</NOBR> joules of energy. Per second. Each.
    <BR><BR>
    In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within <NOBR>4.26 thousandths</NOBR> of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.
    <BR><BR>
    In conclusion: If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.
    </DIV>
    </FONT></BLOCKQUOTE>

    :rofl: :rofl:
    <a href="http://www.harddrivehell.com">http://www.geocities.com/ctnow_da_ru/images/logod.gif</a>

  5. #5
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    Did you read my post on the Physics of Santa Claus ?
    • Q: What is the difference between erotic sex and kinky sex?
    A: During erotic sex you use a feather, during kinky sex you use the whole chicken.

  6. #6

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    Yep, that was posted at least a week ago by Fieldgenerator.
    This is where my signature would go had my host not been such a Bandwidth Nazi.

  7. #7
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    Ahh, but ya left out one VERY important ingredient.

    MAGIC

    :bounce: :bounce2: wings:
    If you think you know what I know and think you see what I see, than why are you asking me questions?

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by G Smith
    Ahh, but ya left out one VERY important ingredient.

    MAGIC

    :bounce: :bounce2: wings:
    There's no such thing as miracles or the supernatural...only cutting-edge technology!
    This is where my signature would go had my host not been such a Bandwidth Nazi.

  9. #9
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    *phhfffttttt*

    Or so you think ! :thumb:
    If you think you know what I know and think you see what I see, than why are you asking me questions?

  10. #10

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    Or so I know. ;)

    Oh, and brownie points to whoever can identify where that one phrase was from.
    This is where my signature would go had my host not been such a Bandwidth Nazi.

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